When I first saw a "Drive-by" birthday party online, I cried. I think it was for a little boy in New York State, and I'm pretty sure it was on the actress Jennifer Garner's Instagram page. I couldn't believe how sweet and thoughtful it was and also how sad and heartbreaking. The only way to describe it was bittersweet.
Well we just had to experience the same bittersweet moment for our daughter Mckenna's 2nd Birthday party. We knew that we would have to cancel her party that was planned months in advance. A small part of me had hoped somehow this would all be over in a few weeks, just in time for us to celebrate with our friends and family. No such luck.
On Saturday we had so many friends drive by, drop of gifts, stop on the lawn (6 feet apart) to wish our baby girl a happy birthday. I wanted to hug each and every single person that came over that day, but I couldn't and that right there is the bitter part.
I miss my people so much, that some days it just brings me to tears. I miss being close to them, I miss seeing them, I miss them all so much it hurts my heart. I try so hard to be positive and to be grateful and to know how blessed I am. I am healthy, I am safe and my family and my friends are too. Some days are just harder than others.
Saturday thankfully had so many more sweet moments than bitter.
When Mckenna looks back at photos of her 2nd birthday she will know she's loved. When I think back to that day, I won't remember how I wasn't able to hug everyone or how crazy the world felt. I will remember how much love surrounded my baby girl. How much my people, our people, her people wanted to make her feel special and loved.
I have always put people before things. I have always valued my family and friends above anything else. I am fiercely loyal and sometimes a bit too passionate about protecting them. I can imagine them reading that word "passionate" and laughing at my word choice. Passionate can translate to things like firecracker, reactive, "attack mode". I'm working on my delivery and my reaction times, but if nothing else I'm loyal to a fault.
If this social distancing has taught me anything it's that putting my tribe first was never a mistake. It's who I am. It just makes this time apart that much more painful. I hope people in this world learn a lesson during this pandemic. I hope they learn to value people above all else. Above their career, above their hobbies, above everything else. Show up for your people, just like our friends and family showed up for us this weekend.
Thank you to everyone who made Mckenna's birthday so special. I'm forever grateful to you.
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